A Personal Memoir: What I Learned from my Gap Year Abroad
Something that most people dont know about me is that in 2019 embarked journey in which I took on a gap year between high school and college, disappearing in Australia. To be more specific, as my high school graduation neared, the thought of college filled me with dread. I was uncertain about what to study, where to go, and I had a subconscious feeling of being unprepared. When my then-boyfriend, AJ, mentioned a program that offered international students placements and accommodation for internships abroad, I thought he was crazy. College felt daunting, so how could I possibly consider traveling across the world for an internship? Moreover, during that stressful senior year, I grappled with severe mental health issues, and I wasn't sure how the trip would impact me. However, after delving deeper into the internship program, discussing my options with my college counselor, and engaging in several informational and persuasive discussions with my parents, I set off for Australia.
Australia became a trip of many firsts:
- first time traveling outside the continent
- first experience living solo in a bustling metropolis.
- first time being away from family/friends for over 6 months
- first time trying vegimite(its disgusting)
- first journey through the emotional rollercoaster of heartbreak
- first time I dedicated time to focus on myself and try to figure out what I wanted to do with the rest of my life
In Melbourne, Australia, a staggering 9,493 miles away from my cozy hometown of Wolverine Lake, the journey wasn't as straightforward as one might imagine. It involved two plane rides, first from Detroit to LA, and then from LA to Melbourne International Airport, with an exhausting total travel time of roughly 24 hours.
During the first leg of our flight to LA, my travel partner AJ accidentally dropped his phone between the seat and a broken panel of the plane. Upon landing in LA, we faced a daunting challenge – we had only about an hour to catch our connecting flight to Melbourne and somehow retrieve his phone, which had become lost somewhere in the labyrinthine underbelly of the aircraft.
To compound our predicament, we found ourselves entangled in disputes with multiple Delta crew members. Adding to the chaos, my carry-on bag mysteriously vanished, taking with it my essential medications, makeup, toiletries, and other personal necessities. With approximately 20 minutes left to board our next flight, we reluctantly abandoned our search and embarked on a mad dash to our gate.
As fate would have it, AJ's phone never made it to Australia, instead continuing its own peculiar journey somewhere within the depths of that plane. Thanks to the wonders of 'Find My iPhone,' we were able to track its journey as it crisscrossed the United States, a bizarre and unexpected turn of events during our overseas adventure.
Touching Down Under: My First Month in Australia
The initial month of my Australian adventure was undeniably challenging. Beyond the taxing journey to get there, I found myself in an unfamiliar place, constantly asking for directions because I had no idea where I was. Australian accents were like a foreign language, and waves of homesickness kept me up at night. My first impressions of Melbourne left me overwhelmed; it seemed like an enormous, cold, and chaotic city. Everything, from the people's mannerisms to the architecture, felt like a surreal episode of 'Black Mirror.'
My new home was at the welcoming RMIT Village, a college hub. Despite a few hiccups like nightly fire alarms and the constant threat of burning down my tiny kitchen, I loved my little space with a balcony overlooking a pool. It had everything I needed.
My internship took place at a travel startup, Backpacker Deals. It was a hands-on, sometimes stressful experience, where I dabbled in various aspects of the company, from PR and Marketing to Funding, Events, and Digital Marketing. It offered invaluable insights into the functioning of international businesses and startup life. I owe a huge debt of gratitude to my companions, Cindy, Suzy, and Marina; I couldn't have done it without them.
As I settled into my new seven-month home, it was time to start exploring. My first adventure led me to Australia's renowned festival scene, Listen Out, set on the beach in St. Kilda, Victoria. The lineup featuring 6lack, Denzel Curry, Diplo, Schoolboy Q, and Flume had me excited until I experienced the festival's wild conditions. A sweltering 35 degrees, 30 mph winds, and scarce alcohol couldn't deter the dedicated Aussie festival-goers in their winter coats and pencil skirts. Watching Flume perform live in his home country was still a highlight.
Next on the agenda was one of Australia's most touristy yet breathtaking excursions. Alongside AJ and our new British/Irish intern friends, Anna, Abi, and Henry, we rented a car and embarked on the Great Ocean Road journey. A five-hour drive from the city, this coastal route along the Southern Ocean unveiled hidden surf beaches, charming beachside towns, and iconic sights like the Twelve Apostles. To this day, that weekend remains one of my favorite memories in Australia, although I must caution those prone to car sickness, like me, to come prepared.
A few days after our Great Ocean Road adventure, my 19th birthday arrived, and it's a day I won't soon forget. With a whopping 15-hour time difference, complications in my relationship, and the stark reality of being halfway across the world from my friends and family, I spent the day feeling lonely and homesick. As incredible as my solo travel journey was, there were moments when I would have done anything to be back home for just a day. I was beginning to feel a sense of pure separation anxiety and the notorious 'FOMO' (Fear of Missing Out) in its truest form.
However, I had a lifeline in the form of my new "international" friends who were determined to drag me out of my funk. We were an eclectic bunch, hailing from different corners of the world, varying in ages, and with unique personalities. In no time, we formed an unbreakable bond and did everything together, from endless club nights and day trips to local markets to exploring the breathtaking coast. Among our adventures, two stand out as my favorites: getting all dolled up to watch the Flemington horse races and fueling each other's gambling addictions at whichever casino we found ourselves in by the end of the night.
The Halfway Point: A Journey of Resilience
In mid-November, a pivotal moment in my Australian adventure unfolded. My boyfriend, my best friend, and the only person I knew from back home decided it was time for him to return. Simultaneously, I found myself grappling with an intense workload at my internship, the pressure of completing college applications, and the heart-wrenching task of bidding farewell to the close friends I had made in Australia. I felt heartbroken, depressed, and overwhelmed by the uncertainty of what lay ahead. Sleep and appetite eluded me, and I found myself retreating to my bed, rarely emerging.
The life I had once lived comfortably was undergoing a seismic shift, and it had already changed significantly. A business trip with my internship took me to the Gold Coast for the Adventure Tourism Awards. Despite the exciting surf lessons, weekend adventures, and the magic of watching the sunrise on the beach, this trip forced me to confront the stark realization that I wasn't where I truly wanted to be. I needed to figure out how to take care of myself now on my own for the remaining four months of my journey. At this juncture, I longed for a touch of home, counting the days until my mom's visit at the end of the month.
Finally, late in November, my mom arrived for a week-long visit, accompanied by her best friend, Sherri. The tears of joy that welled up as I embraced my mom for the first time in three months are unforgettable. We spent hours talking about my experiences and how much I missed home. During her visit, my parents suggested that it wasn't too late for me to return home and start college for the second semester. However, I wasn't ready to abandon my overseas experience just because of homesickness. We enjoyed wine nights, went shopping, and before my mom's departure, we hosted a genuine Thanksgiving celebration for all the friends I had made. And by "genuine," I mean a group of fifteen people from all over the world sharing a Thanksgiving feast in Australia – a mix of 4 English, 3 Australians, 3 Americans, 2 Dutch, and 1 Italian. It was a bittersweet farewell, but seeing how proud my mom was of me provided the much-needed reassurance to face whatever challenges Australia had in store for me next.
As the following weeks passed, Australian university students began to head home for the summer, leaving me as the lone resident at RMIT. Embracing the solitude, I decided to embark on a trip to Cairns, Australia, renowned as the gateway to two of the world's greatest natural wonders: the Great Barrier Reef and the Wet Tropics Rainforest. I wasn't entirely sure of my plans, but I knew I needed a change of scenery. So, I booked a night at the exquisite Sheraton Mirage in Port Douglas and let spontaneity guide me from there. I met up with local friends from Cairns, who took me on a captivating road trip up the coast. It marked my first experience of the authentic Australian outback, replete with waterfalls, rainforests, and awe-inspiring landscapes that left me truly speechless.
Further Travels and the Sydney vs. Melbourne Debate
As the summer holiday season approached, I had the pleasure of hosting my Dad's visit in December. With our shared enthusiasm for adventure and the thrill of the unknown, I eagerly took charge of planning our itinerary, and our first destination was Sydney. The eternal debate about whether Sydney or Melbourne holds the title of the 'best' city in Australia rages on. These two iconic cities, although both undeniably Australian, couldn't be more dissimilar in terms of aesthetics, ambiance, and energy, making it all a matter of personal preference for the intrepid traveler.
Melbourne
In my personal assessment, I may be a tad biased, given that Melbourne was my home for seven transformative months, but Sydney simply didn't measure up. Melbourne exudes a cosmopolitan charisma reminiscent of New York. It's celebrated as the 'cultural capital' due to its renowned fashion scene, an array of art galleries, and the captivating labyrinth of graffitied laneways. The city delivered a fast-paced daily existence, characterized by diversity and boundless creativity. However, Melbourne's Achilles' heel is its unpredictable weather, which could deliver all four seasons in a single day.
Sydney
Sydney, on the contrary, projects the allure of Los Angeles in Australia. With its temperate climate and urban beaches, it steers clear of the concrete jungle vibes, offering a more refined cosmopolitan ambiance. From my perspective, the biggest downside during our weekend in Sydney was the nightlife scene. In response to issues of city violence, Sydney had implemented 'Lockout Laws,' which mandated curfews for bars and clubs, requiring patrons to enter before 1 a.m. and restricting the sale of alcohol. Despite this, we relished the opportunity to witness and capture iconic, Instagram-worthy landmarks such as the Sydney Opera House, Manly Beach, and the mesmerizing Icebergs at Bondi. Our Christmas day was spent on Bondi Beach, alongside thousands of others clad in festive red bikinis and Santa hats – a unique Australian Christmas experience.
Following that, my father and I embarked on an unforgettable father-daughter journey to the breathtaking Whitsunday Islands. Nestled amidst the world's largest coral reef, the Great Barrier Reef, the Whitsundays boast pristine white sand beaches that can only be described as paradise on Earth. Our days were filled with thrilling activities, from snorkeling through vibrant coral gardens to exhilarating jet skiing adventures, all while taking in the unrivaled beauty of the beaches and the opulent yachts that graced the azure waters.
This trip served as a much-needed respite, affording me the space to relax and mend emotional wounds that had yet to fully heal. Upon our return to Melbourne, we ushered in the new year from a rooftop with my Dad and my lively, albeit somewhat intoxicated, Dutch and English friends. That moment, along with the entirety of my Dad's presence in Australia, marked a profound turning point in my journey. It was during this time that I realized the importance of being kinder to myself and embracing the present moment, allowing life to guide me on its unpredictable path.
After a series of indulgent vacations, I began to notice the alarming depletion of my funds, prompting me to search for a job. Armed with my printed resumes and no prior experience, I hit the streets, determined to secure a position in hospitality or retail. I took a chance by walking into my favorite city restaurant, CHIN CHIN, and spoke with the managers. As they escorted me downstairs for an interview, I couldn't believe my eyes when I spotted Serena Williams and a group of tennis players, enjoying a meal at a private table. With no experience but a sprinkle of American charm, I somehow talked my way into a waitressing and hostess role. For two months, I reveled in this job, forming friendships with adventurous souls who led me to unforgettable experiences, like attending the city's most famous drag show club (thanks to Alex and Chiime).
However, this role had its challenges, particularly when you work at a restaurant that consistently draws an hour-long queue every weekend. The fun came to a halt during my closing shift on Valentine's Day when a coworker accidentally spilled scalding water on my foot. A visit to the doctor confirmed second-degree burns, which left me bedridden for an entire week. I'll spare you the gory details, but it took nearly hiring a lawyer to finally secure my worker's compensation and bid farewell to that chapter.
My next round of visitors included my grandparents, my cousin Kalie, and her foreign exchange student, Sophie, who hailed from Sydney. By this point, I had become a local and an adept tour guide, showing them all my favorite city spots. We dined at cherished restaurants, spent a day at St. Kilda Beach to witness the penguins, and embarked on a vineyard and wildlife tour where I encountered my first up-close koala and kangaroo. Just a heads up, kangaroos weren't a common sight in the area, but they remain one of the most fascinating creatures I've ever seen. Koalas, on the other hand, with their undeniable cuteness, swiftly became my new favorite animals.
One Last Run: The Home Stretch
With just about a month left until my return to the States, one of my dearest friends, Lauryn, made the bold decision to return after her internship and spend the remainder of her visa in Australia. Lauryn and I were kindred spirits, known for our wild antics whenever we were together. A memorable night out involved us needing 4 am hashbrowns, which led to a clandestine mission into a McDonald's while unknowingly noticing the employees on their break just outside. Our unauthorized escapade triggered the alarm, locking them out, and incidentally making me a temporary McDonald's 'employee.' During her visit, we spent the week catching up and meticulously planning our itinerary for one last hurrah to the Gold Coast and Byron Bay.
As the night before our departure marked my final outing in Melbourne, we went to karaoke night at a hole in the wall backpacker bar with my friends Aly and AJ – not to be confused with the American pop duo, though they did know how to belt out some absolute Y2k bangers. After a long last night, a not-so-surprising twist, we ended up missing our check-in time by a mere seven minutes, and the airline refused to let us on the plane. What followed was nothing short of a disaster. We whiled away 8 hours at the airport, waiting for the next flight, which was further delayed until 8 pm. Upon our eventual arrival in the Gold Coast, we encountered more obstacles, including a delay in reaching our Airbnb host. Nevertheless, we finally settled in, lounging in pool chairs, soaking up the sun, undeterred by one missed flight, one delay, and two hangovers. The remainder of the trip was a chaotic and improbable adventure. It rained incessantly in Byron, Lauryn lost her coveted designer ring in the ocean, and she possibly contracted a the newly developing COVID-19 virus. She decided to return to Melbourne early, and I continued my journey in the Gold Coast, reuniting with a friend. My final weekend in Australia was a mix of randomness and relaxation, marked by rain, wine nights, an exquisite Australian Spaghetti Bolognese, and my second attempt at surfing.
The day of my departure loomed, and I began packing my two excessively heavy bags, bracing myself for the journey home. However, just as I was preparing to embark on my planned 16-hour journey, my Dad called. He informed me that I needed to bypass my intended week-long stay in LA and college visit to LMU to head straight home. Consequently, what was supposed to be a 16-hour journey expanded to 27 hours due to multiple connecting flights on the eve of the pandemic. With ample time to reflect during this arduous journey, I pondered the tremendous personal growth I had undergone during my time abroad. My experience turned out to be radically different from what I had expected, but I wouldn't have it any other way.
Embracing the Unfamiliar: A Journey of Transformation and Self-Discovery
It's challenging to articulate, but there's an undeniable transformative power in traveling abroad, leaving behind the familiar and adapting to new routines. Stepping outside of my comfort zone forced me to confront my insecurities and reevaluate my goals and passions. While it may sound cliché, it's essential to question how far we're willing to stretch ourselves in pursuit of personal growth. Before I embarked on this journey, people often asked me about my confidence in going abroad, but the truth is, I wasn't confident at all. The prospect of a gap year overseas seemed both exciting and daunting. As someone who has battled severe anxiety and depression, I was no stranger to self-doubt. Even while residing in Australia, there were moments of doubt and uncertainty about my decision, and whether I was equipped for such a significant transition. Nonetheless, I persevered and faced my biggest fears, embracing the challenge of navigating a foreign land alone.
Life is a continuous process of evolution, growth, and self-discovery. It requires us to expand our horizons, explore the world, and dare to dream. By learning new things, broadening our horizons, and being mindful of where we direct our attention and efforts, we become more versatile individuals. Control what captures your focus and cherish the time you invest in your passions. There's an abundance of time to shape the person you aspire to be, so don't hold back. Start that business. Book that plane ticket. Relocate to a new city. Step outside your comfort zone and make friends with strangers. Embrace everything that terrifies you, because life is fleeting, and it's worth every exhilarating, challenging, and beautiful moment.
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